Here Is The Top ‘Love Language’ For Each Myers-Briggs Personality Type | Page 2 | Thought Catalog
I'm an INTJ female and the only guy I have ever liked is this INFP male. I mean he's very shy as a person and doesn't date a lot, so I can't. ISTJ ISTP ESTP ESTJ ISFP ESFP ESFJ INFJ INFP ENFP ENFJ INTJ ISFJ INTP ENTP ENTJ Best types for a relationship: ESTJ, ISTJ, INTJ, ISTP, ESTP. INFP. Your expectations are too high. You dream big, but this means you ESTP . You put your partner last. Literally, last. Like behind the lady in line INTJ. You test people. Because this type holds such a fear of wasting.
The INFP will clam right back up if they feel remotely judged, criticized, or unheard, and it will be a long while before they try again with you. If they ever do. It is not uncommon to find INFPs who habitually isolate themselves or push people away, often because they had negative relationship experiences in the past or even just because they fear negative experiences. Remember they are extremely sensitive, so deep emotional wounds can take a long time to heal.
A wounded INFP will protect that rich internal landscape with the tenacity of a pack of junkyard dogs. Admittedly, these self-protective INFPs are hard to build relationships with, but it is not impossible with patience, time, and practical affection. And I will add here that it is entirely worth it, because any INFP is a wonderful partner when you really snag one.
And once they trust you, they actually like it when you encourage them to get outside of themselves. They can be hilarious, silly, fun, playful partners. They can be wonderful performers and storytellers, in part due to their rich imaginations.
They are also great with kids, in part because they are somewhat childlike and innocent themselves. They do well with bright, optimistic, cheerful, peaceful, steady, independent partners who are undaunted by their dark spells.
Because INFPs even under the best of circumstances are prone to dark spells, depression, and self-pity. They are very hard on themselves and prone to feeling guilty or ashamed and getting stuck in cycles of feeling this way. And they will usually withdraw when they are hurt or overwhelmed.
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That said, they do need your encouragement to come back from the dark side, especially if you have done or said something to contribute to their shutdown.
I know that sounds confusing. This is mostly because there is so much going on inside of them all the time and so few outlets for it that sometimes they need to just check out. But there is also a point at which you may need to go in after them and drag them back out to the light. Again, if you have done something even unintentionally to hurt them, you will need to make it right somehow in an authentic way before they will be able to come back to the relationship fully.
So, a better way to say it is: Thanks for telling me. It is somewhat ironic that INFP is so likely to withdraw, because it costs them the connection they need to keep them steady.
They have a contradictory combination of desires: Please remember that no matter how much they love you or feel connected to you, you simply cannot fence in an INFP without encountering a great deal of resistance.
The balance is in being there for them and showing care, but also permitting them space to roam and be the lone wolf they often feel they are. They need to trust you to be there when they come back. The more times you are still there when they return, the greater the trust can grow. The fact that you will end up with an utterly devoted INFP is worth all of this effort. You may have to remind them fairly often to come back to Earth.
So, if you are a person who needs a great deal of positive reinforcement, you will need to ask for it, and your INFP will have to make a conscious effort to meet that need.
In fact, one of the primary reasons INTJs seek relationships is to have someone to share ideas with. When it comes to forming and developing relationships, INTJs often have a few factors working against them. For one, they express themselves via their auxiliary Te rather than Fe. Consequently, like other TJ types, they can come across as blunt, mechanical, or lacking a certain degree of tact or social know-how.
Their reputation as arrogant know-it-alls can also be attributed, in part, to misperceptions involving their Te. While INFJs are strong in extraverting their judgments, INTJs can be even more so because they lack the peacemaking, people-pleasing, and socially sensitive elements of Fe.
INTJs may also be labeled as excessively stubborn or rigid, although this too relates to Te-related misunderstandings. In order to compensate for such misunderstandings, INTJs might reason that if they could only understand people better they could overcome their relational difficulties. This may inspire them to gather as many facts and self-help strategies as they can regarding human psychology and relationships.
INFP CUDDLES INTJ
While there is certainly nothing wrong with doing so, it may not always remedy their predicament in the way they might expect. For one, INTJs with a history of relational difficulties can be prone to attribute those failures to psychological problems in their partners, thereby failing to see their own shortcomings.
While not necessarily their fault, this should comprise at least as much of their relational attention as trying to see and diagnose problems in their partners. To be fair, accurate self-evaluation can be a problem for all J-types, since their preferred mode of Judging Fe or Te is directed outwardly rather than inwardly.
This is one reason why typology can be so useful for INTJs, as well as other types. One of the hallmarks of Fi is a desire to preserve and defend the uniqueness of the individual.
Related to a strong concern for the individual is the Fi desire to aid the weak, helpless, and marginalized of society. This is why IFPs, for instance, can often be found helping the homeless, working with children with special needs, protecting endangered species, etc. Once we add Fi into the mix, it is not hard to see how INTJs might be attracted, even if unconsciously, to rescuing and fixing those who seem needy or helpless.
The relationship then becomes a sort of psychotherapeutic forum, with the INTJ working to analyze, diagnose, and treat his wounded partner. It zeroes in on the unique features of the individual and grows deeply attached to those qualities.
Here’s Why No One Wants To Date You, Based On Your Myers-Briggs Personality Type | Thought Catalog
While INTJs may not experience the consistent strength of feeling that FP types do, they are nonetheless influenced by the less conscious workings of Fi, which helps inspire loyalty, love, and commitment. This makes it a highly alluring function, powerful enough to inspire a fierce and protracted tug-of-war with the dominant function.
Money also relates to status, another Se-related desire.